MIrror Talk Series # 2 - Allowing His Unconditional Love love me

Henri Nouwen has blown me away yet again with his honest, heart-rendering words. This Mirror Talk portion is taken out of his book "The Inner Voice of Love." I encourage anyone reading this to pick up his book. It's definitely an eye and heart-opener!

Title: Allow Yourself to Be Received
Giving yourself to others without expecting anything in return is only possible when you have been fully received. Every time you discover that you expect something in return for what you have given or are disappointed when nothing comes back to you, you are being made aware that you yourself are not yet full received. Only when you know yourself as unconditionally loved--that is, fully received--by God can you give gratuitously. Giving without wanting anything in return is trusting that all your needs will be provided for by the One who loves you unconditionally. It is trusting that you do not need to protect your own security but can give yourself completely to the service of others. 

Faith is precisely trusting that you who give gratuitously will receive gratuitously, but not necessarily from the person to whom you gave. The danger is in pouring yourself out to others in the hope that they will fully receive you. You will soon feel as if others are walking away with parts of you. You cannot give yourself to others if you do not own yourself, and you can only truly own yourself when you have been fully received in unconditional love. 

A lot of giving and receiving has a violent quality, because the givers and receivers act more out of need than out of trust. What looks like generosity is actually manipulation, and what looks like love is really a cry for affection or support. When you know yourself as fully loved, you will be able to give according to the other's capacity to receive, and you will be able to receive according to the other's capacity to give. You will be grateful for what is given to you without clinging to it, and joyful for what you can give without bragging about it. You will be a free person, free to love.

In this season, I am learning that I am loved unconditionally, and that I have to allow His love to love me limitlessly. I pushed His love out of certain areas of my life thinking that I had those wrapped up well in my own arms. However, I am beginning to see that I have been limiting his unconditional love in areas that need so much attention.

Lord, I allow you to love me unconditionally especially the areas that I have hidden from you. Help me to love others from the understanding and experiences that I am received fully, completely, and without any conditions.

Self-Doubt: Jeremiah & I

Jeremiah was very hesitant about the calling on his life from the get-go. He questioned God whether he could attempt to do what he was purposed for. While facing an up-hill battle against his own worries, doubts about self-worth and self-efficacy, Jeremiah replied to the calling, "I will go."

Passages later, Prophet Jeremiah curses his own birth, the day of his birth, the person who joyfully declared his birth, and his mother's womb. Every word from God was about the fire-breathing imminent judgement upon the people of Israel, and he had had it.

As a young woman who feels as if life could not be filled with even more questions. I am feel overwhelmingly confused about the calling itself. Did I hear it wrong? I cannot seem to remember the weight of its purpose and power I had felt at the time it was bestowed. I am no longer proximate to the calling than I had been yesterday. Yet, there is a calling to draw nigh to Him.

I am now relying on the pull of His grace, the faithful grace, to call me Home. I am in the water hip-deep, and waiting to be called in deeper. I may curse the day I was born, but He visited me in the womb. He gave life which I may not be fully ok with, but who am I to refute when the vessel is in the hands of its potter?

Oh how great is your faithfulness

When I keep stumbling, Lord have mercy
When I intentionally walk away, Lord have mercy
When I feel forlorn and weak, Lord have mercy
When I can't find my way, Lord have mercy
When hope can't be found, Lord have mercy
When pain remains deep, Lord have mercy
When passion fades away, Lord have mercy
When dreams become lost, Lord have mercy


"if we are faithless, he remains faithful--for he cannot deny himself."
2 Timothy 2:13

Mirror-Talk Series - # 2 (Becoming Purposeful)

Today was the day when I was reminded by Him about getting to know my identity again. With my identity in mind, there is a purpose in my existence. Life should be lived purposefully. As an adult coming to age, I realized that I became the person I hoped that I would never be. I was being ridden by life like a horse, like I did not have a say.

Today, I finally had the time to reflect. And I asked God, what is my identity and how do I realize it? He gave me three questions:

1. Who am I?
2. Who have I become?
3. Who should I be? 

After reflecting, my conclusion is this: I have to live up to my identity as a Child of God. The Scripture says that His Word became flesh, His Word brought things to life, His spoken Word came into existence. When He speaks of me being His child, His beloved, then His Word has become flesh in me, it has brought me to life, and his word exists through me. In order for me to be who I am, I need to be available to His Word to live and breathe in me, daily.

Be purposeful. Be available.

Mirror-Talk Series Begins...

Let go of the past; stay in the present; be hopeful of tomorrow

I need to constantly remind myself that my life is written each moment I breathe. It's not the next breath, next hour, next week, next month, next year, or 10 years from now. Life is lived in each moment.

I usually lose my focus on today when I get caught up with future promises and distant visions. Not surprisingly, the past has an equal power on me. The "what-if," "oh-Lord-why," "if-i-could-relive" moments are crippling.

He continually teaches me that my life is defined not by my past or future, but by my present. What am I doing now? How am I living now? Where am I now? The power of change is within me. He lives in me. I must exercise it now.

"I will be hopeful of tomorrow."

Love in Progress

The deprivation within our somber circumstances often triggers the enlightenment of a long-forgotten identity--children of God. Our prodigal son experiences of forsaking identity along with our possessions brings us to many "pig-pen" situations. In those grim, solitary, and yet sobering situations, we "come to ourselves." We realize what we forsook, forgot, and forfeited. And we run back to a forgiving father who also runs to us, embraces, and kisses our sorrows away. Surely, by now we would think we know what it means to be surrounded by such an overwhelming and amazing Love. And yet, we have miles to go before we eternally rest, and He is never finished with us.

So dear believers, let us be optimistic about moving onto more opportunities to help sober up our "christian walks."